Saturday, August 15, 2015

Thoughtlessness

Typically thoughtlessness is considered closely related to inconsideration, isn't it?  Well I decided to do an entry without thought or without planned thought.  I think that I have mentioned before that I write on 750words.com yet I haven't been very consistent.  I love consistency, I dream about it I long for it, I envy it in others.  I myself, on the other hand am not very consistent. I suppose it boils down to habits.  You do what you want and leave out what you don't.  Even if those things you don't want to do are things that you really want to do!

Possibly it's just a fantasy that you'd like to do certain things to enrich your life or the like.  But if you really wanted to do them, you would....wouldn't you?

I long for consistency in my life, let's take for example exercise.  I would love to be consistent at exercise everyday, but that is not what takes place in my life.  The only way I am consistent with something such as exercise is if I am accountable to someone or an appointed time to meet someone to exercise.  Then I am very consistent.  What is the psychology behind being accountable to someone else but not myself?  Does it boil down to self worth?  Do I not value myself enough to have worth to be accountable to myself? Or do I really deep down not want to exercise?

There is a litany of things that I do this with in my life. But the list cannot be all that bad because I do have a job, family, obligations, bills that I am consistent with....but that could be because others are counting on me to be accountable.  Hmmm, there again, it is with things that have to do with myself personally that I am inconsistent with, that is interesting.

I must say before I go on, 'thank you" for reading this post of pure pontification. 

I believe that creativity must have a small thing to do with inconsistency.  There is a measure of dullness with consistency I have noticed.  When a person is creative, there are major inconsistencies possibly due to distracted thought.  I should probably consider researching if there is a book out there that specifically measures the differences in highly creative people and highly consistent people.  My father and I are one of each.  He is highly consistent, like award winning consistent.  I always wanted to be like him, I still do!  However I don't know how I can be a creative and be consistent. 

I have learned a couple things in this mid-life era of my life and that is, slow down.  Slow the heck down.  I cannot whip through all the things I want to do or accomplish or learn as fast as I thought I could and it just frustrates me, so I have learned to slow down.  I am starting to look at my life in terms of the years overall that I have left.  I would say approximately 40 years left if I live that long.  Or if the Lord doesn't come back between now and then.  So 40 years, what could I plan or learn in 40 years?  Tons!! 

So relax and enjoy and take the days one at a time, that is what I am always telling myself.  So many things I want to do and learn, yet I will experience a greater measure of fulfilment if I do slow down and stop thinking of life as if it's ending tomorrow, yes we are not promised tomorrow but I don't want to have anxiety today due to racing through life.

So as for consistency I have 22 days straight of writing 750 words thus far and I plan to go for 100.  I almost made it to 100 back in 2011, I failed on day 97.  The website is pretty neat-o because they award your account with badges if you write consistently.  I have a few badges and the longest writing streak badge that I have is 30 days.  The next badge is 100 days, it's the "Phoenix" badge 100 days of writing....consistently!  But then I would like to get all the badges, I think they go up to 1000 days, I'll have to check again.

I wonder what writing really does for a person? Getting all the words out.  I know that I have heard of articles written where writing does something for the emotional well being of a person.  I will continue and find out.

On another note, what about reading fiction?  Does that really do anything for a person?  I asked a couple of "readers" and I wasn't really satisfied with their answers, no definitive responses just "it brings me pleasure, or makes me happy or I like it".  I want the scientific, or psychological answer I suppose.  Maybe I'll have to look that up too, until then  Goodnight, thanks for reading, whoever you may be :)